Most of us dream of exchanging vows with that special person only once in a liftetime. The truth is, that, for many reasons more and more people are getting married for the second time.
That doesn’t mean that your second wedding will be any less special. It will probably be different to your first wedding but it will be more about the two of you and you may find it so much easier the second time around as you have all that life experience and knowledge.
So, what are the advantages of getting married for the second time and how do you make it a success.
You can ditch the big wedding:
Often the first time, the wedding revolves around not only the Bride and Groom, but the family as well and you find that you are trying to keep everyone happy. Many couples get caught up in the wedding itself rather than focusing on each other and the commitment they are about to make. The advantage to getting married the second time is that you can do exactly what the two of you want. You don’t have to please everyone. Many couples realise that a huge guest list is not that important. It’s more about having close family and friends around you to share an intimate celebration.
Traditionally the first time around, the Bride’s family pay for the wedding. This time you are probably financing the wedding yourselves and splitting the cost. So, you can choose to have the wedding exactly the way you want and remember, it is possible to have an amazing wedding on a budget no matter where you plan to have your ceremony.
You can elope!
That’s right. Why not plan a destination wedding.
Many couples getting married for the second time are opting for a destination wedding. Combining your wedding and honeymoon is a wonderful way to celebrate. Not only can you plan a unique wedding and honeymoon in an exotic location, but chances are that most of your guests won’t be able to make it. You may choose not to even invite anyone. So, you can focus on just the two of you and committing to each other in a wonderful, intimate location.
We have arranged many destination weddings for couples who are marrying for the second time, and the lovely thing about them is that the couples are generally more relaxed and focused on each other, which probably comes from experience.
You’re more confident:
You have been married before and you know how hard it can be to make a relationship work. With all of that life experience and knowledge, you enter into your second marriage knowing so much more and knowing that things are going to be different. Chances are that you are older, more confident and happier in yourself. You’re also able to communicate with each other better. All of this means that you can be your true self in the relationship without fear of it causing issues. This makes it easier to have an honest, committed relationship with someone who loves you for who you are.
You don’t have to rush:
Having been married before, you now realise that there is no rush to tie the knot. You’re older, wiser and you realise that you can enjoy the relationship and do everything in your own time. There is no pressure from family and friends so you can enjoy a long or short engagement and the fun of living together. You can get married on your own terms when it suits you.
You can involve the children:
Chances are that one of both of you may have children. Your second wedding is a wonderful way to involve them and make them feel that you are committing to them as a family as well as to each other. It not only develops the bond between you and the children but also makes the wedding more meaningful. You can involve them in the ceremony by making them part of the Bridal party, giving them some sort of special recognition during the ceremony or bestowing a special gift to them during the service.
You can be as traditional or modern as you want:
Choose a date that is special to the both of you. Many couples marrying for the second time choose to elope, often not telling anyone until after the wedding.
Generally, the size of the wedding is more intimate so not only is the guest list smaller but so is the Bridal party. Many couples choose not to have any wedding attendants at all.
Your wedding attire can be as formal or casual as you like to suit your wedding location and theme. Many Bride’s opt for a more modest ivory or coloured gown rather than white or even a skirt or suit which may be worn again. Many Bride’s still choose to wear a veil but wear it in their hair rather than over their face.
Your reception can be as elaborate or casual as you wish. Remember this is a celebration of your relationship and commitment to each other.
Remember there are a few second wedding Dont’s:
Generally, bachelor or bachelorette parties and Bridal showers are not appropriate for a second wedding. Many couples opt for a simple couple’s shower or leave the celebration to the reception.
A large wedding Gift Registry is not appropriate. You are not starting out and having to setup your home. For this reason, gifts are not mandatory at a second wedding, however many guests will still want to bring one. A small wedding Registry may be set up for convenience.
Choosing who to invite to a second wedding can be tricky. Inviting ex spouses, in laws and mutual friends is a very personal decision. If inviting the ex and ex family is going to cause tension, don’t do it.
Whilst your second wedding may differ from your first in many ways, some aspects remain the same.
Unless you are choosing to elope or have a very simple affair, you may want to consider the following components in planning your wedding.
Invitations and RSVP’s
Wedding location and reception
Wedding Attire and Bridal Party Attire
Thank you Notes for your Guests
With a little thought and planning, your second wedding can be just as special, enjoyable and memorable as your first wedding – if not more so!
Contact Australian Dream Weddings now to plan your second wedding.